Freedom!

I'm pretty young, yet I've been through so much it might be unbelievable to some. All my stories could fill a book, and maybe one day, I'll be healed enough to write that book, but for now, I'll stick to fiction.

Every time I went through something especially tough, I thought "There's no way I'll be free from all this pain!" Several nights I cried myself to sleep thinking, "God it hurts so bad, will it ever stop?" Several times I thought I would literally lose my mind. Other times, I thought I'd never be able to walk with my head up again. I felt crushed and even sank into depression. My friends never knew what was going on in my head. I held my pain deep within and told no one. I'd plaster a smile on my face and say that I was fine. I went about life, singing and dancing in church, serving on committees and offering a shoulder to lean on for other young ladies who faced situations similar to mine. But for all these years I was broken. It seemed that the minute I was healed from one thing, something else would surface. Over and over, the cycle continued. At one point I just wanted to die, but, I'd never take my own life, so instead, in desperation I asked God to free me or kill me.

I look back at all these situations years later and I realise that my prayers were answered. God had greater plans for me than I could see, so he didn't kill me. Instead, he freed me. And, as an added bonus, he made me stronger. All those situations in my life were my testing ground and I came through alive. I have the battle scars from my wounds, but I'm no worse for the wear. Last year, I went through something that would have broken me had I gone through it five years ago. It would probably have taken me years to get over it, but here I am, one year later and it's just a fading memory. My trials made me stronger and I'm free.

True freedom does not mean that you will never face another challenge, it means that the next time you do face a challenge, you will be able to handle it. It means that instead of piling up hurt and pain, you'll be able to overcome and move on. It means that the next time somebody hurts you, you'll truly be able to forgive. It means that even though you are in pain, you will see sun behind the clouds and still be able to move on. It means that you can lift your hands and worship without the past staring you in the face.

And how do you attain true freedom? The bible says in 2 Corinthians 3:17 "Now the Lord is that Spirit; and where the spirit of the Lord is, there is liberty." Plain and simple, that's my answer. True freedom came when I allowed the Spirit of God to work in my life. Jesus said in Luke 4:18:

"The Spirit of the Lord is upon me,

 because he hath anointed me 

to preach the gospel to the poor; 

he hath sent me to heal the brokenhearted, 

to preach deliverance to the captives

 and recovering of sight to the blind,

 to set at liberty them that are bruised,"

I can't put it any plainer than that. A relationship with Christ brings freedom. It is what he came to earth to deliver to us. I can guarantee you that I'd never have made it through those difficult years without a relationship with God. My friends paid no attention to me, even when they knew I went through difficult stuff. That is part of the reason I hid my hurt. I figured "they don't care anyway, so what's the point?" But, I went daily to God, begging for relief and resting in his arms until I got it. Today, I can say I'm free from the hurt that crippled my mind for many years. Free from the pain and free to worship my God!

Joana James - Author of Nightmare at Emerald High & Alana and Alyssa's Secret

A Legacy of Love

A Legacy of Love

Psalm 119:28 (NIV)

My soul is weary with sorrow;
strengthen me according to your word.

I haven't seen either of them for a very long time; however, I often see their hands in my memory. Sometimes I remember the way my little-girl  hand disappeared into his large hand as we walked to the lady down the street who still had a working well in her yard. And hers – so little and yet they could reach across an octave when she played the piano with a passion that bordered on gusto.

The memory of their hands that means so much was never captured in a photo, although it remains vivid in my mind. Each of them had black leather-bound Bibles they read daily, and on some times they'd read for hours. He held the page he would be turning in his right hand. Over time, his fingertips wore pieces of the pages off. She would wet the tips of her pointer and middle finger to turn the onion-skin thin pages to find the passage she was looking for – usually with tenderness, but sometimes like an eager child opening a present from someone special.

My grandparents, Ed and Joy Johnson, loved their Bibles and even as a child with no spiritual understanding, I knew those big black books were their most valuable possessions.

I was walking into church one Sunday a few months ago. I'd been having an especially difficult time, and hadn't noticed I was literally clutching my Bible to my chest as I entered the building. The greeter said, "You love that Bible don't you?"

I looked at the large black book in my hands and said, "Yes. I do." As I waited for the service to begin, I turned to Psalm 27, her favorite passage, and smoothed the page out with my right hand – my own Bible reading ritual – knowing I was holding God's Word in my hands, loving the feel of the pages under my skin, and missing the two people who taught me its value – without ever saying a word.

Then, in the depths of my spirit, a smile formed and my lips gave it expression. My journey hadn't changed, but confidence in God and His Word grew. I released a silent prayer of thanksgiving for my grandparents left me this legacy of love for His Word.

Psalm 27:13 & 14

I remain confident of this:
I will see the goodness of the LORD
in the land of the living.
¹⁴ Wait for the LORD;
be strong and take heart
and wait for the LORD.

Written by Joy DeKok, author of Your life a Legacy

Joy started writing as a little girl. She carries a large purse so she can take her journal and an assortment of pens with her.

Joy lives on thirty-five acres of woods and field in Minnesota between Rochester and Pine Island. She’s been married to Jon for thirty-five years and they enjoy their many nieces and nephews. Their dogs, Sophie and Tucker, keep them company when they explore the land riding their John Deere Gator or while watching the many birds that visit their feeders.

She has seven books in print and is working on a novel series featuring main character, Olivia Morgan. Joy is also developing a writing group called, Write Yourself Strong, for hurting women.

Faith is a vital part of Joy’s life. When she was sixteen, Joy asked God to find her and He did.

Go forth with Faith

As a writer, there are plenty of times when I feel like I just need to give up. Sometimes it's a bad review, sometimes, it's the fact that there are no sales. Other times, the very thought of putting myself out there for the whole world to see is so scary that I just want to run back into my house and hide. And writing is not the only thing that I want to give up on sometimes. I had such a stress filled day at work yesterday that it took every ounce of energy in me not to burst into tears. As it stands, I still need a miracle before 9:00am Monday. But, my hope and faith is not in myself.

Whenever I'm giving a difficult task, my boss says, Joana, "I have faith in you". Luckily for me, I take that statement with a grain of salt...I don't trust myself with any task. I give it to God. My faith is in him. I have no doubt that he's placed a tremendous amount of talent in me, but without his input, everything I put out there would be pure rubbish. I bring the effort and God brings the genius. That is why I will not give up on writing or on any of the other things I tend to want to give up on.

 Last night, I was reminded of why I write YA, and why I won't give up. I spent the evening with my church youth group, which I helped lead for a few years. Last night, I was not a leader, but an observer and a helper. I saw people I helped lead to Christ now leading others. I saw young ladies I counselled and mentored, now counselling others. It was an awesome feeling and it reminded me that God has given me something to say to young people through my stories.

So, to you I say, Don't give up. There will be naysayers and the like giving you bad advice. Trust God and have faith in his abilities, not yours. Know where he's taking you and why he's taking you there. Use that knowledge as your reason to go on. It takes faith to move forward when you're not seeing results. But faith is the biggest ingredient in the recipe of Christianity. "Without faith, it is impossible to please God."

Go forth with Faith! 


Joana James - Author of Nightmare at Emerald High & Alana and Alyssa's Secret

Trusting God

Trust is a small word with five little letters; yet a mountain to climb. Trust involves giving away control of some degree or aspect of your belongings, your emotions or your life.

It’s relatively easy to trust someone with your belongings. We lend our friends our books, our cars or even our houses. Trusting others with our emotions might be a little bit more difficult however, we eventually get to the point where we give in. With our lives – that’s whole other ball game. To give over control of the direction your life takes to somebody else is sometimes unfathomable.

But, that is what God requires of us. Proverbs 3:5-6 says to “Trust in the Lord with all your heart; do not depend on your own understanding.  Seek his will in all you do, and he will show you which path to take.” Can we really wait for God to tell us which path to take? If you’re impatient like me, you probably don’t like that scripture verse very much. Sometimes I feel like God is taking too long to make stuff happen and I want to do it myself. I’ve found that I always make a bigger mess of things. Exercising a little bit more patience and trust in the one who engineered me always brings the right result at the right time. So why do I/we always try to go back and take control of stuff again, even after we’ve seen God work on our behalf? It’s because, even with evidence of the contrary, letting go of your own destiny and allowing someone else to fulfill it feels like suicide.

So, like hamsters on a wheel, we take control, we mess things up, we give it to God and when he fixes it, we try to take it all back. Over and over and over, we do the same things until something drastic happens to us and God gets our attention.

At the end of the day, if we look back, we’ll see that it would have been so much easier just to trust God in the first place. He’s our creator and he has our best interest at heart.  He also knows the best way to fix any situation in our lives. We trust mechanics with our cars because they know more than we do about how a car functions. God knows much more about us and about how our lives should function than we could ever imagine. Trust Him and watch him come through for you. 

Joana James  - Author of Nightmare at Emerald High & Alana and Alyssa's Secret

Nightmare at Emerald High - The Journey

Before I wrote Nightmare at Emerald High, I thought I’d never be able to write a full length novel. I always loved to write and I’ve written many a short story, but I never broke the novella barrier. Nightmare at Emerald High started off as a project to prove to myself that I could go further and do better. I wrote every waking moment, plotted and worked on my characters whilst on my day job and even stopped to jot down notes during sermons (yes, I made notes for my book during church ). I was determined to make this one happen.

One of the things that helped me most was the fact that I loved my story. Malcolm (my protagonist) was a lonely, geeky teenager who loved computers. In other words, he was the male version of me as a teenager. I put Malcolm through the ringer and had him jumping over boxes and running through never ending hallways and I loved it. That, for me, was the key to breaking the novella barrier. I loved the story. It was something I would pick up from a shelf and buy because it sounded like a fun book. It took me about six weeks to bang out the first draft and I was so proud of myself. Part of me wanted to just print the darn book and place a copy in a frame somewhere!

But of course the hard work had only just begun. After several edits, it was finally ready for the public. My first full length novel and I felt like I’d won a Nobel prize!

So here it is – Nightmare at Emerald High – the synopsis.
Malcolm Drake is one year away from the end of high school when a tantalizing scholarship offer comes his way. Malcolm and several other classmates eagerly join a program called Alternative Science that promises to open their minds to new ways of thinking and of course, help them win that scholarship. Little did they know that this program would change their lives forever. The class is riddled with eerie séances, encounters with spirit guides and a slow desensitization of the teens towards everything evil until they become completely entangled in the world of the occult.

With the program being run by the town's most influential people, the kids have a hard time getting out. Teachers that they trust hold them against their will and try underhanded tactics to convince them to remain in the program. Will good prevail over evil? Will the kids escape with their innocence?